seriously women? seriously?

Look, I'm no hardcore feminist. I prefer that men mow the grass, carry heavy boxes and open my doors while out on dates*. But what the fuck is going on over on VH1? Why am I seeing a houseful of bikini-clad women vying for Brett Michaels affection? Why am I watching a woman drink herself into oblivion for the sole purpose of trying to convince the others that she is "not innocent"? Seriously? And for the love of the Goddess, why are all these damn women crying or fighting all the time???

Tonight is the first I have seen this show. I've heard about it and immediately knew I wanted no part. I am so f'ing tired of these shows where women are competing for a man and making themselves look stupid and worthless in the meantime. And yet, here I am, still watching this mess of a trainwreck. And wanting to scream at the top of my lungs.

HAVE SOME DIGNITY!! QUIT FUCKING CRYING!! PUT SOME CLOTHES ON, PUT DOWN THE DRINK AND PICK UP A BOOK!! FOR THE LOVE OF WOMEN EVERYWHERE!!!

Seriously. I'm tired of it. It's one of those things that make me want to climb dangerously to the top of a radio tower in L.A.** and not come down until all of these shows are removed from TV and women everywhere quit acting like dumb whores. My nightly 2am viewing of West Wing cannot come on soon enough***....

* On men opening doors for me. I've decided that opening doors is a gentlemanly gesture that I greatly appreciate. I don't expect, or even want, men to open my door at the office. At the office, I want to be considered equal. In fact, it's much like carrying a heavy box. At work, I can do it. I don't need anyone to do anything for me. Outside of the workplace, I consider it especially kind if a man asks if I need help carrying something or reaching the case of water on the top shelf of the grocery store. Poor guys. No wonder they have such a hard time figuring us out...

** A la Daryl Hannah's tree climbing incident (which was far more interesting than I remembered it being).

*** As it turns out, West Wing is not on tonight. My anger and frustration will have to be curbed by a viewing of Cold Case, which in turn will probably leave me feeling icky and depressed.

**** I just realized all of this would go away if I would just throw my damn TV out the window once and for all...

{Edit: Tonight's episode of Cold Case is actually a fictionalized version of the West Memphis 3, a case I've been following since 1998. In '99 I felt so strongly about the cause I actually donated money to their defense fund. Infuriatingly, the three boys (now men) are still incarcerated...

I guess my point here is that not all TV is bad. Especially if it brings awareness to issues we may not have previously known about. Still, women vying for men on national TV suck.}